I have consistently made excuses for why I haven't written since Summer, and the only semi-legit reason is that I'm not in Europe anymore, therefore my life isn't "cool". Buuut I feel that I will regret it oh so much if I don't continue. And what better time to begin again than the beginning of a brand new year?
While sitting here thinking about the upcoming year, I am overwhelmed with feelings of hope, nervousness, gratitude, curiosity and happiness.
I'm hopeful that I will continue to be better each day.
I'm nervous that I am growing up too fast and not enjoying each moment.
I'm grateful for everything and everyone that has contributed in some way, to get me where I am today.
I'm curious to see what people will be introduced into my life this year.
And I'm overcome with happiness at where my life is right at this moment.
Before diving into a new year, I feel that I must reminisce the previous year and take time to be grateful for everything that Heavenly Father blessed me with. I also believe that you learn the most from the hard times in your life, and while remembering the not so great times, you can see how much you have grown, how far you have come, and maybe a glimpse of the bigger picture of why it happened that way.
Growing moments of 2014:
Stepping down from my position and not continuing with Student Council was hands down one of the most difficult choices I have had to make in my life so far. But while it was hard and a huge lifestyle change, I am grateful that I had the courage to act on my feelings and make that change despite what others thought. I know without a doubt that this is what I was supposed to do and while it still is hard and didn't end the way I would've like it to, I am grateful that I know that there is a greater plan for me and this is just one of the steps in shaping who I am.
Throughout my life I have always been blessed with incredible friends that have done more for me than I can ever repay. While I have grown and changed so much, I had to learn to rely more on myself for my happiness and not so much on others. "You have to learn to love yourself before you can love others." Oh man, I couldn't think of a more true statement. Being alone has never been an easy thing for me, and while I found myself feeling alone a lot this year, I also found myself enjoying being with just myself. I learned that it really doesn't matter if someone doesn't like you or if somewhere along the way your friends change, what really matters is that you are continually becoming better and that you believe that you are a good person. After I realized this, I was fortunate enough to be blessed with so many people that have had such positive impacts on me. I also learned that you learn something from EVERY single person you meet. Whether it is good or bad, you can take something new to better yourself with everyone you cross paths with.
In April when I was diagnosed with Shingles (yes that is the disease that 86 year olds get) I started questioning if I was going to have bad health my whole life. That lasted 7 1/2 weeks and I thought I was over being sick, but when I got an ulcer, I didn't know what to do. I have never missed more school in all my years combined as I did this year. I lost hope of getting better and came to peace that maybe I would be sick my whole life, and then I finally opened my eyes and I realized that everything our Savior emulates is hope. And if I wanted to be like him, then of course I need to have hope. I'm grateful that I can say that I have developed a testimony of hope and that it is one of the greatest characteristics that a person can have. Without hope, we really do have nothing. Oh, and I am now a firm believer that positive thinking is the best medicine out there.
I felt that I lost myself this year. Maybe I was caught up in myself or maybe I wasn't focusing enough on myself, but whichever it was, I feel I lost my way a bit. I wasn't the real Mikayla for a little while, and while I'm sad that I wasn't, I'm grateful that I now realize that. How can you know the good without the bad? I see now that the hard times were when I learned the most and during those times is when I was receiving the most blessings without knowing it. This is my favorite poem (try not to cry.. i dare you.)
One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.
Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky.
In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand.
Sometimes there were two sets of footprints,
other times there were one set of footprints.
This bothered me because I noticed
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.
that during the low periods of my life,
when I was suffering from
anguish, sorrow or defeat,
I could see only one set of footprints.
So I said to the Lord,
“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?”
“You promised me Lord,
that if I followed you,
you would walk with me always.
But I have noticed that during
the most trying periods of my life
there have only been one
set of footprints in the sand.
Why, when I needed you most,
you have not been there for me?”
The Lord replied,
“The times when you have
seen only one set of footprints,
is when I carried you.”
“The times when you have
seen only one set of footprints,
is when I carried you.”
My heart is full of gratitude knowing that The Lord will carry us through our trials. If we have faith, hope, and rely on our Savior 100%, then I know we can be carried through the hard times and we will realize more the everyday miracles that He blesses us with.
Okay okay. Not it's time to remember how 2014 was also a total party and jam packed full of fun.
And what better way to relive your year than through pictures? "A picture is worth a million words".. or something like that.
Highlights of 2014 in pictures:
first time driving
silent night game (this is our everyday clothes)
Spanish Fork's Homeless for a night
Oh good ole golf season
the bff's mission farewell
The day we found out we made Student Council
(ps I had shingles in this picture)
San Rafael Swell
Huntington Lakes camping trip
Color Festival
Last picture as 2013-2014 student council
*casually has photo shoot during school*
Jordan Parkway longboarding trip
Graduation day ft. two greatest examples
Jmac's cabin trip (right rachel? RIGHT-O)
taken right before the spitball war of the century took place
The beginning of Saturday sk8 nights
USU camp - green team dream team
and then I met B hunny
fab/fierce/fergalicious four
Vienna, Austria
@ Popa's house ft. beautiful mom
When MTV cribs came to Austria
rollerblading in Europe with Grandma
LEGAL oh so legal
first homecoming with this stud
The oh so classy Royalty
WOW! theres a smiling picture of me and dallin!
After many hours of practice...
Lehi rivalry football game
Bowling work party
snowshoeing with my (fav) brother
The last picture of 2014
Looking back on this year, and a few of my favorite pictures I can say with a surety that this year has been the best year so far. I cannot even express in words how grateful I am for the amazing people in my life, for the experiences i was able to have, for my family, the relationships that were developed and everything in between. I'm excited to see how 2015 is going to top it. Good luck.
(And hopefully I won't wait until 2016 to write again..)
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